. . . more first-year firsts (PART II)

the first family photo:  I had been in Haiti for a few days wrapping-up all of the final INS and US Immigration steps needed to bring Wilton and Meremen home.  Which, as an aside, if you think that moving through the D.O.T. line is slow, try getting a Visa at the US Embassy in downtown Port-Au-Prince!!  Luckily, we had been forewarned by some friends and I was armed with coloring books, fruit snacks, granola bars and water . . . four hours in a small, hot, waiting room was a serious test of patience.  Meremen and I even wrote a song, “Ou bezwen patience, ou bezwen patience, ou bezwen patience.”  The monotony of “You need patience” was somewhat soothing.  On traveling-day, we had gotten up early that morning and traveled from Haiti to Miami (long-layover) and onto Atlanta.  After two years in the process, it was all-smiles to have everyone under the same roof.

the first time in a sprinkler:  While this may seem like an inconsequential “first”, what most of us would consider to be good-summer-time fun, would be seen as an inexplicable waste of water for any Haitian.  The kids had only been home for a day before they headed off to day-camp at church.  SPLASH-DAY was a huge hit.  Jenny said that not only was it for sure the first time they had ever played in that much water (sprinklers, water-guns and slip-n-slides), it was the first time they had ever been on grass barefoot before.

 

the first time to a restaurant:  (see previous post for loading up the car to go eat).  The kids (and mom and dad) love going out to eat . . . and when I say “going out to eat,”  I mean, “going out to eat Mexican-food!”

 

the first day of school:  Wilton and Meremen had both been attending a school in Haiti since coming to the orphanage, so they understood the general schedule and idea of going to a school.  Unfortunately, as we have discovered, the school in Haiti seemed to consist mainly of copying words off of the black-board, trying to behave in order to keep from getting whacked by the teacher, and trying not to have your stuff looted by the school staff (i.e. when we visited the orphanage, the teachers would tell them, I know your parents are visiting from America, you better bring me something — usually candies, snacks, etc . . . explains how the batman watch disappeared).

the first day of cold weather:  In the winter, Haiti cools down to the high 80’s.  Once when I was visiting the orphanage, Wilton and Meremen insisted that we move out of the shade and into the sun (they were shivering in the shade!).  Needless to say, the cold weather was new . . . as was the fact that it was going to last for a few months.  The new jackets, hats and bunny ear-muffs seemed to help in coping with the cold! 

the first year as a family of six . . . officially this Sunday

I can't explain why we have put it off until now, but on Sunday at the 9:00 AM service, Wilton and Meremen will be baptized.  Amazingly, this Sunday marks the exact one-year anniversary of Wilton and Meremen coming home.  We would love to see you on Sunday morning and to have you there for the service. I almost can't believe that this Sunday will mark the one-year anniversary of Wilton and Meremen being home.  There are some things that make it feel they have been home forever (the way they relate to and play wonderfully with Harrison and Abbey — except for the visibly obvious, you would think that Harrison and Wilton were separated at birth) and there are some things that make it feel like it has only been a short-while (like Wilton still calling shorts "dee-otha pants"). ha haThe first year has been filled with lots of "firsts." Riding bikes, swimming at the pool, going to the beach, playing basketball, playing on a soccer team, eating dinner at restaurants (which by the way, I am afraid they think that all restaurants serve chips and salsa when you sit down — we are a crazy Mexican-food loving family), we even got to take them to Disney World (along with 15+ other family members thanks to the generosity of my mom and Beebo).

We have certainly had a more difficult year than we planned for. We had braced ourselves for so many things . . . how will Abbey and Harrison deal with having new siblings? how will they respond to being out of birth-order? how will our community respond to a bi-racial family? will Wilton and Meremen have attachment issues? or affection issues? language issues? adjustment issues? These have only been secondary issues.

These are the things that we spent our two years in waiting thinking about and reading about and praying about. But what we didn't expect were the adjustment issues facing mom and dad (me and Jenny).

There is probably a school of thought out there to keep your children's and family's struggles to yourself . . . and for those people, I will say, "everything is good . . good . . yes, very good." But to the realists, I will tell you this . . . going into this process, I sub-consciously thought (not good theology), "Man, God is going to be really proud of me. Yep, storing up some treasures in heaven for this one." And now I see the much bigger(and truthful) story of our adoption process. Just like our biological children, God has used this process to show us that there isn't any amount of good-deeds that can bring us closer to Him. And in our own strength and in our own will-power we are simply short-tempered, self-centered, easily tired and easily frustrated. Our first year with four children has brought us closer to the end of relying on ourselves and, thankfully, it has brought us to the foot of the cross and to relying on Him alone. We love because He first loved us.